Better

Oh Porsche, how I love thee.

I missed riding her. It's been forever since the last time I did. And I had a really nice time today.

I went to my lesson with my friend Amy. She's super awesome. We met because we're both taking lessons and DeDe introduced us. I think she's super weird though, because she likes Lola better than Porsche!

We took Porsche out at first. We planned to alternate every fifteen minutes or so. It had been longer since Amy had ridden, so DeDe wanted Amy to go first. I took pictures and Amy rode. She did some walking and circling, and then a little bit of trot. Amy seemed to be having trouble with Porsche's trot though, since it is bouncier, so I got on Porsche and DeDe went to get Lola.

It felt nice to ride on my own for a little bit. I just walked around the round pen and turned a little, but I felt in control, confident, and comfortable. Porsche really is my comfort zone.

I rode around the round pen for a long while, just being comfortable and getting some riding time. Amy lunged Lola I'm the dressage court for a little bit and then got on bareback! It was really exciting, but I didn't see much of it, since I was riding. Porsche was pretty good unless DeDe was close by. For some reason, she chose those moments to act up: trying to open the gate, not turning when I asked her to, and not stopping when I asked her to. It's like she was trying to make me look bad!

DeDe eventually moved me to the dressage court with Amy. Amy was walking Lola, and then she and DeDe lunged her. I went around the court at a walk, did circles and figure eights and zigzags. I felt really happy with the way this lesson went. Not much actual content, but I felt like I regained a lot of confidence from my time in the saddle. I also tried to think about my riding position. I've been reading lots of articles and watching lots of videos about sitting trot lately, and so I had a lot to think about. I tried to keep my heels low and my weight in the stirrups, and to make sure I was not leaning forward and that I was moving my hips with the motion of the horse. Harder than it sounds!

At one point, Lola took off. I guess Amy was lunging her, and Lola just pulled away and took off running back to her stall. I didn't realize it until Lola ran right in front of Porsche and me. I had a little moment of panic; I felt Porsche tense up and I thought to myself, she's going to take off, too. I kept my cool though (mostly), and thought of one-rein stops until we both calmed down. I have to admit, I don't feel comfortable with Lola's behavior... this is the second time she's taken off like that around me.

I really feel like I needed this kind of a relaxed lesson. I felt very good about it. Hopefully next time I'll learn new things and keep this confidence :)

Push...

I've been putting off posting about Thursday's lesson because it was just the worst. The worst. I took me forever to finish this stupid post, because I rehashing is so discouraging. I don't have any pictures either, and I wouldn't post them here even if I did.

I'm a little bit frustrated with Julie. She started school and she hasn't been communicating with me much at all. I spent all of last week trying to figure out what day we were going riding, and when she had classes and when she had work. It wouldn't be a big deal if it was just she and I hanging out or something, but I honestly think it's not fair to DeDe to text her at the last minute canceling our lessons. It's understandable, but frustrating all the same. So, this week I went with my uncle.

Someone else had been riding Porsche, and hosed her off when they were done, so I had to ride Lola.

I really don't like riding Lola.

She's just too advanced for me. That's what it comes down to. I feel very insecure riding her and I think it really isn't safe. Unfortunately I didn't really have another choice this week, but I will certainly make sure next time that I'm going to be riding Porsche.

DeDe was pushing me pretty hard, too. Sometimes that works and it's great, but I was already very nervous and it wasn't really helping. She already knew I was on this horse I was uncomfortable with. I feel like Thursday would have been the day to take it easy, walk through some traffic cones, zig-zag around the dressage court. Just do things to make me feel comfortable and safe. There have been days that I've felt like she could have pushed me harder and I would have been happy, but she seems to only push hard when things aren't going so well. I feel like DeDe sees that I'm not in control and then gets really pushy about it.

We did some groundwork at the beginning of the lesson, and that actually went really well. I lunged Lola a couple of times around in both directions and it went super smoothly. Everything was great until I got on.

Basically, I was really uncomfortable. Rather than letting me get comfortable with Lola, DeDe put us on the lunge line and had Lola trot and canter. I was so, so excited to get to canter, but frankly I kind of hated it. I felt so nervous and precarious and unsafe that I couldn't relax. DeDe kept demanding that I keep my heels down and put my weight in the stirrups. She yelled at me when she wanted me to let go of the saddle horn. She asked my several times why I couldn't do it. I didn't have an answer, and I don't really have one now. It's very hard to think about doing so many things when I'm so nervous, and my teacher is yelling at me, my horse doesn't listen to me, I feel unbalanced because she is trotting diagonally instead of straight forward, I had no warning about when we were going to start cantering, I've never done it before, I'm not riding my regular horse, I'm bouncing and I can't stop, and my teacher is yelling at me.... I want to have fun when I go riding, not feel like I'm awful at it and the horse hates me. I think DeDe forgets sometimes what it was like to learn.

To be clear, I really like DeDe and I think she is a good teacher, but I left on Thursday feeling very discouraged.

She texted me after I left the stable that I'm doing really well and that I have talent and that it takes guts to do what I'm doing. It kind of sounded like an afterthought. Like she felt bad about how the lesson went so she tried to make me feel better. Maybe that is unfair, but sometimes it feels that way. She also told me that she is getting a new horse on the 9th. He is an ex-lesson horse and she said that he will be perfect for me. She also said that I will have no more fear.

I really hope that's the case.

Frustration

Today kind of felt like banging my head against a 1200 pound wall. It was just a weird, kind of sucky lesson.

Julie and I usually arrive about a half hour early for lessons. We've done this every time we've had a lesson so far. I didn't last Friday, but that was only because I thought she had someone scheduled directly before me. However, when DeDe got there, she seemed surprised and irritated that we were there early. I guess she has been stressed lately. She is sort of in limbo with her housing situation and is currently looking for a place to live. In our past couple of lessons, she mentioned it, but she was still her usual peppy encouraging self. But today, she definitely brought it all with her.

Julie and I kind of expected to ride today. My heart sank when DeDe said we were going to be doing groundwork. It makes me really nervous and uncomfortable, frankly. I know I need to get over it. I want to have horses one day and it's something I need to know how to do. But... I guess riding, in the end, gives me a confidence boost that groundwork does not. I know Julie feels the same. Probably more so, since I seem to understand the concepts of groundwork a little better than she does.

This time we each had our own horse to work with. Julie had Lola, and I had Luca. The reason we haven't ridden Luca yet is because he has an abscess on one of his feet. I was a little confused about why we were taking Luca out today. For one, he makes me nervous because he is young and a bit nippy, he has been cooped up in his stall and has a lot of energy. For two, he has an abscess. The vet said to hand walk him bit I felt like this was putting a bit of pressure on me. He was fine leaving his stall, but on the way to the round pen, he decided it was time to jump around and get excited (spooked?), and I freaked out a little. It was a bit embarrassing, really.... I didn't exactly scream, but I definitely squeaked and dropped the lead rope. He's just a bit too high strung for me still, I guess. DeDe took the lead rope and took him into the round pen and lunged him for a little bit, let him roll in the dirt and whatnot, but in the end he was too lame for her to be comfortable with it. She put him back in his stall and brought Porsche out instead. I didn't really understand why we tried him in the first place. He scared me quite a bit and it put a damper on the rest of the lesson for me.

Julie had a lot of issues with today's lesson. I don't know if it's just because she was being a butt or didn't understand her or something, but she had a lot of trouble getting Lola to do what she wanted. I felt bad. I felt like the lesson ended on a really sucky note for Julie, and she seemed really bummed about it. I did a teeny bit better, but I'm not sure if that was because I understood better, or because Porsche was more willing to listen to me. I still wished that I felt like we accomplished something besides being awful at groundwork.

On a brighter note, we bought some black licorice, which is Pandora's favorite treat! She was really excited about it. Julie snapped a couple of really cute pictures of me with Pandora, and one or two with her super-sweet next door neighbor. We couldn't take pictures of each other doing groundwork, since we each had a horse. Which is a good thing, I guess!

She let me pet her for all of about one second.

I kept pulling her over, trying to get a picture holding her head, but she was not having it. She wanted to know where the rest of her licorice was!

Silly Pandora! It's all gone.

I love this horse. She's amazing. One day I'll be able to really ride her!

It's really bothering me that this picture is a different size from the others, but Julie took it with her phone and it's just sooo cute!

Slightly Scary

This is going to be a bit of a long post. I always wanted details on what you learn in your first horse riding lesson, and it was difficult to find anything beyond the very basic list: groom, saddle, mount, dismount, start, stop, turn.

I know Julie was a little bit scared when we went for our first lesson this past Wednesday. She's never been on a horse before, or really been around horses at all, so it was kind of a big jump for her. Even though I've ridden before, I was definitely nervous too. Way overexcited, but nervous.

We were working with Lola this time. Lola is a little fleabitten grey mare. I think she's a quarter horse, but I forgot to ask. She was sort of a rescue; DeDe was hired to train her by owners who abused her, but the owners eventually gave up on her and sold her to DeDe for a dollar. You would never know it, though. She's very sweet.

When we got there, the Ringling Bros train was going by. This sweet girl was freaking out about the noise and the smell. Her name is Lacey. She wouldn't stop pawing and tossing her head and snorting. It's a little blurry, but this was the only picture I got of her that she didn't look absolutely terrified. She's gorgeous, though.

DeDe explained to us how to lead a horse. She talked us through putting the halter on Lola, and then explained that we should be at the horse's left side and hold the lead rope in our right hand, with the excess coiled in our left hand. She told us to walk out, and that the horse should follow, and that to stop we pull the rope directly backwards and say "whoa." She then handed me the lead rope. I had trouble getting Lola out, since she's a little barn sour. I didn't realize I had to ask nicely for her to move! I thought it was so funny that I had to tell her to "walk out" and click before she would come out of her stall.

I led Lola closer to the train, where we were going to groom her, but Dede ended up leading her part of the way since it was making he a bit nervous. She tied Lola to a hitching post, and showed us how to use the different brushes. We used the rubber curry comb to get the dirt to the surface of her coat, and the body brush to brush the dirt away. We didn't use the dandy brush, since Lola is a little sensitive to it. We brushed through her mane and tail, and learned how to pick up Lola's feet and pick them out. They were surprisingly heavy! And it was hard to tell what was dirt or pebbles, and what was hoof. I know that probably sounds silly, but hooves are confusing things. After that, DeDe explained how to saddle the horse as she showed us. I would have like to try it myself, I but I see that it wasn't really practical to have us taking the saddle on and off and on and off.

DeDe put Lola on the lunge line and showed us what cues we were going to be using: "whoa" to stop, once click and "walk out" to ask for the walk, two clicks and "trot" to ask for the trot, and a kiss to ask for the canter. She told us those are fairly universal cues; most horses will respond to them. Then she showed us how to put the bridle on the horse.

After that it was off to the mounting block. She talked me through it as I got on. She told me that I should hold the reins in my left and try to hold onto the horse's mane, not the saddle horn. I wasn't comfortable with the idea of pulling on Lola's mane just yet, and DeDe said it was fine to hold the horn for now. She still had the halter and the lunge line on the horse so we could get comfortable and learn to move with the horse. It was a little intimidating to be so high off the ground, and I had definitely forgotten what it felt like to ride. For some reason I didn't remember having to move my body so much, but DeDe told me I had a perfect seat (thanks to years of horse-craziness, I understood what I was supposed to be doing).

First DeDe showed me what to do in case of an emergency. She showed me to pull on one rein to disengage Lola's hindquarters if she bolts, so she has to stop running. She also told me that if Lola bucks, I can pull her head up, and that will stop her. Rearing is a little more difficult since there's not much you can do, but leaning forward will help keep the horse from getting up. Then she had me cue Lola to walk around the pen.

After several corrections from DeDe, I got comfortable with the riding position and the motion of the horse, and she had me turn Lola around to go the other direction. I had a bit of trouble with it. I wasn't sure exactly where I should put my hands on the rein, and I seemed to always have to reach down the rein to have any leverage to turn her. I also had issues with stopping her, since she always wanted to go back to the center of the ring to DeDe. I guess I just held the reins a little looser than I should.

At one point Lola sort of took off on me. She misunderstood DeDe's cue and decided that it was time to trot, and it really caught me by surprise. DeDe told me to pull back on the reins, but in the moment I kind of froze up and just held onto the saddle horn. DeDe ended up stopping her for me. She explained that I had let my chest fall forward and my back round, and my feet moved backward. I wasn't entirely sure how that exacerbated the situation, since I was a bit flustered in the moment. 

Dismounting was a bit tricky for me. Since I had been so excited and nervous, my legs were a little shaky, so I had trouble getting my leg over Lola's back. I eventually got down, no worse for wear, and Julie took her turn. She seemed to have a bit more trouble with the reins than I did. It really is hard to gauge how long they should be. She also had issues with the stirrups; since they just wouldn't go short enough for her, she felt unstable and uncomfortable.

Afterward, Julie led Lola back to the hitching post and we brushed her down with just the soft brush after DeDe removed her saddle and Julie removed the bridle. I led her back to her stall. She was in such a rush! I had to keep pulling back to slow her down to a reasonable speed. We put her away, and then fed her, Luca, and Pandora some baby carrots we had brought with us. :)

This turned out to be really long... but I really wanted to talk about everything. I had a really good time and I'm super excited to learn more! Julie and I are probably going to be going every week, and I'm hoping to fit in another lesson on my own every now and then. So... I think that's all! Unfortunately I only have a couple of pictures to share (and unfortunately Julie's phone broke, so the pictures of me are lost). Next week I will really try to take more! Until next time :)

The Beginning: Begging for Ponies

I always wanted a pony.

I used to ask Santa every single year for a horse, and Santa was always a disappointment. When I would run outside on Christmas morning, there was never a pony. Not even a miniature-lawn-ornament pony, and every year I would cry. I fell asleep almost every night with my horse encyclopedia close at hand. I used to beg my mom for a pony. I didn't understand how expensive horses are, and I wanted one so badly. When I was four years old, I had a dream that I was a pony, and I told my mom that I should have been born a horse. She will never let me forget these things.

My mom used to take me on some birthdays to go trail riding. We would go with my cousins and siblings and closest little girl friends, and get on these horse that had glazed eyes, and knew only to walk nose to tail. Still, I thought it was the greatest thing in the world. I even got my horse to trot once or twice, which, as a little horse-obsessed girl, is the most exciting thing ever. We never had the money for me to take real lessons or to have my own pony, though I would beg, trail rides once every other year or so was the best we could do.

The horse craze lasted until I was 12 or so. Some disagree with me on that point, though. I say, the craze ended then. I learned to contain my absolute and utter love for horses and act like a normal human being before I finished middle school.

Now I am 21. It's been a long time, but finally I've begun to make my childhood dream come true. Last week, I went to a stable with my best friend Julie, met with an instructor, and made an appointment for a lesson. The lady's name is DeDe. She's very nice, and she asked lots of questions about what we wanted to learn and how we felt about horses, and talked us through the things we're going to learn. Afterward she introduced us to her horses. She has five horses she uses for lessons: Lola, a little white mare, Luca, a bay Thoroughbred gelding, Pandora, a huge Percheron-Friesian cross mare, and a grey Arabian and a chestnut Tennessee Walking Horse whose names I forget- I only met them briefly.

Yesterday we had our first lesson. DeDe taught us to lead and groom Lola, and showed us how to tack her up. She showed us how to cue Lola to walk, trot, and canter on the lunge line first, and then had us mount and ride. I'll talk more about it in another post.

I don't have any pictures of me riding, since Julie took pictures of me with her phone. I do have a couple of her riding, though. I'm super excited to go back, and I'm hoping to be able to take more than one lesson next week- crossing my fingers!